Watching Diane von Furstenberg: Woman in Charge on Hulu, felt like Christmas in June. As a total fashion nerd, I was completely in my happy place. Little did I know just how impressed and inspired I would be. Here are my biggest takeaways from this empowering documentary:

Don’t Be a Victim

This isn’t about victim shaming; it’s about victim empowering. Healing from an abusive relationship is one of the hardest things I've ever experienced. But it’s the smallest part of my life because I choose not to let it define me. It’s a chapter, not the whole book. Just because you were dealt a bad hand, doesn’t mean you have to fold. Rise above and reclaim your story.

Fear Is Not an Option

To change the trajectory of your life, you have to embrace fear and move past it. Choosing fear keeps you stuck. As long as you are breathing, you have choices, and you can choose anything but fear. Move forward, step out of your comfort zone, and see what happens.

Change Your Environment

As a proud plant mom, I know that sometimes my plants need a change to thrive. Whether it’s rotating, repotting, or adjusting their water, these changes help them grow stronger. Similarly, to be the healthiest and brightest version of yourself, you need to step out of familiar spaces and try something new. It could be a new coffee shop, a new job, or even a new state. You’ll never know how far you can thrive if you stay in the same place.

There are psychological factors that make you crave the next new thing. However, chasing every new trend will leave you exhausted, dissatisfied, and lost. Relying on external factors to feed your soul sets you up for a wild ride of codependency. Just say no to constant change and embrace the timeless.

“Everything Old Becomes New Again”

There are psychological factors that make you crave the next new thing. However, chasing every new trend will leave you exhausted, dissatisfied, and lost. Relying on external factors to feed your soul sets you up for a wild ride of codependency. Just say no to constant change and embrace the timeless.

"I Became the Woman I Wanted to Be. I Was in Charge of My Destiny."

Women are often put in a box, and that box is even smaller for black women and women of color. The most beautiful things come from women who look at the limits before them and step over them. Be a badass, break the rules, and go against the status quo. It won’t be easy, but it can be done. Remember, well-behaved women rarely make history.

“I am a person, not a couple.”

Nothing hit harder than this quote for me. I can confidently say I am Dejeuné first. I have been a mom for almost half of my life, and I’ve had to pull myself from some very dark places. Abuse can distort your vision of yourself, but the effort it took to find my way back home—to me—can never be taken away. Reclaiming my identity outside of my roles, relationships, and accomplishments, without mom-guilt, has been empowering.